The power of reflecting on your personal journey with your horse

I’ve never talked about this before (or how much it haunted me) but a few years ago, I was offered a dream opportunity. @horseandcountrytv reached out and invited me and Woody to travel up North to have a dressage lesson on camera, for a series on everyday riders with @dressagewithbobbyhaylerwright.

I was hugely excited and felt so proud to have been asked, but at the time, I’d never even driven a horsebox or travelled to another venue. I remember discussing it with my coach, asking lots of questions of the producers. My initial excitement turned to embarrassment and I quickly felt like an imposition, like a “novice” in the worst way.

I thought so much about other “equestrian influencers” I saw and how this wouldn’t be a big deal for them and why couldn’t I just be ready. I felt like my 11 year old self at the riding school again: surrounded by people with their own ponies who were just “better”. In the end, Woody had an abscess and I couldn’t go. Deep down I knew it didn’t feel right and I was scared of how big of a thing it was in my head. I would have cancelled anyway.

I was brought up to grasp any and every opportunity and I never forgot how much of a failure I felt that I wasn’t ready to grasp the opportunity to train with an incredible professional.

It came up into my head yesterday as I was driving back from @mirihackett’s yard. Now, a few years on, driving my own young horse, on a long journey completely alone, having spent time taking him out and setting him up for success.

I don’t really know what the moral is here because I appreciate it’s not the most relatable story, but I guess there is something to be proud of in getting myself here and in the reminder that your personal journey is the only one that matters. Everything for a reason. Time is a construct and your journey is happening at the right pace.

Beautiful photos by @hollyouttridgephotography